John Denver golf song

Ole and the 12 pack

A Texan walks into a bar in Minnesota and clears his voice to the crowd of drinkers. He says, "I hear you Minnesotans are a bunch of hard drinkers. I'll give $500 dollars to anybody in here who can drink 12 bottles of beer back-to-back."

The room is quiet ... no one takes up the Texan's offer.

Ole get up and leaves. Thirty minutes later Ole shows back up and taps the Texan on the shoulder. "Is your bet still good?" asks Ole.

The Texan says, "Yes" and asks the bartender to line up 12 bottles of beer .

Immediately Ole tears into all 12 of the bottles drinking them all back-to-back.

The other bar patrons cheer as the Texan sits in amazement.

The Texan gives Ole the $500 and says, "If ya don't mind me askin', where did you go for that 30 minutes you were gone?"

Ole replies, "Oh, I had to go to the bar down the street to see if I could do it first."

Yeah, this reminds me of someone...

Trevor the farmer was in the fertilised egg business.

He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets' and eight or ten roosters, whose job was to fertilise the eggs.

The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn't perform went into the soup pot and was replaced.
That took an awful lot of his time, so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so Trevor could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing.

Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simply by listening to the bells.

The farmer's favourite rooster was old Jacob, and a very fine specimen he was too.
But on this particular morning Trevor noticed old Jacob's bell hadn't rung at all!

Trevor went to investigate. The other roosters were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover.

But to farmer Trevor's amazement, Jacob had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.

Trevor was so proud of Jacob, he entered him in the Polokwane Country Fair and Jacob became an overnight sensation among the judges.

The result was the judges not only awarded Jacob the No Bell Piece Prize but they also awarded him the Pullet Surprise as well.

Clearly Jacob was a Pulletician in the making: Who else but a Pulletician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.

Do you perhaps know of a Pulletician called Jacob?

Joggers

Cosplay FAIL



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